tangled tomatos – amongst other things…

P1030833One of the jobs that Mr T was tasked with last weekend was untangling and tying up our tomato plants, left to lie and fraternize amongst themselves, that had begun to topple over with their own weight, and had my Mum tut-tutting at our laissez-faire approach to gardening- where were the neat, upright rows that she was so enamored of?  I don’t know, the young people these days..

The hot weather has dried and cracked the ground and for miles around the grass is straw coloured and tinder dry.  The lucky amongst us find a cool, shady tree to lie under.  Preferably on a swing seat they got for Christmas 😉

P1030839It has to be said that the first part of this week has been wasted by the black slug of depression and I was fearful of it lasting longer but this morning I woke a little better and was even more improved by the sound of the courier dropping off a parcel.  The long awaited (not so long – I am just impatient)  Flow Book for Paper Lovers had arrived and it was out of bed to fetch coffee and toast and back with Toastie and Charlie to help me unwrap the book.  Oh it is so lovely – containing all manner of papery goodness, stickers and tags and labels and writing paper, satisfyingly weighty and stuffed full.

P1030824If you are looking it would make a great present for someone.  I will show you a few pages..

P1030831 P1030830 P1030827 P1030826My crochet cardigan is coming along slowly, very slowly the pile grows.

P1030822I have bought another ten skeins of wool which will be enough to finish it, so now all I need is a clear head to do the work.  I am hoping that is not too much to ask?

yesterday is gone and that’s good..

I have no photos to show you today.  I left the camera down at Mum’s and will get it back tomorrow, so you’ll just have to make do with my words…

Most on my mind today is Lammas or Lughnasadh, it is the first of the three harvest festivals that I and my small band of friends are celebrating ( a week late) and I am supposed to be preparing the little speech I will make tomorrow night when we all gather.  I am getting there but I have my Mum staying with me and it’s difficult getting the head space to sit down and write.  No doubt it will turn out alright on the night and it’s just great that we get together and celebrate once again.

Today has been good.  Yesterday however was a different story. I woke in the night from some nightmare in which I had been trying furiously to call for help and eventually yelled so loud that I woke myself up with the sound of my voice ringing in my ears.

It was all downhill after that and I spent the day so tired and miserable that I could have drowned myself quite happily. Mindfulness and desperately hanging on to hope helped me to get through the day.  I thought that because I had been so well for a couple of weeks that I would continue getting better and better, but no.. I have learned over the years how to measure my level of depression by my crochet performance – on a scale of one granny being the worst depression to 10 being no depression at all, yesterday was a zero granny square day in that it took me all evening to nearly finish one before I discovered I had made a mistake in the first row.

I pulled it apart this morning…

As I said – today has been good.. In fact the polar opposite, so all I can put the misery day down to is the new dosage of my medication – here’s hoping that’s what it is and there will be no repeat 🙂

Speaking of crochet, the pile of squares for my cardigan has grown to 12 small and 1 large, only 16 to go.  I have had to buy more yarn as there is only 75 meters to a ball, it really is gorgeous yarn though.  I really wish I could show you my little crocheted pile of wonderfulness, but it will have to wait.